You meet someone. You fall in love. Slowly, you want them in your life forever.
You long for them, sometimes even cry for them. And when things don’t go your way, you complain, yet you keep wanting them anyway.
But somewhere along the way, something shifts.
Most of the time, you end up romanticising the act of wanting, not the person. You are so busy longing for them that you forget to be grateful for them. You stop noticing their goodness. You stop valuing who they actually are.
The feeling of “I want them in my life” convinces you that you love them the most, even more than they love you. It grows so loud that it dominates the love you actually have for them.
You start to measure their love against your own standard, the way you think love should look. When it doesn’t match, you feel unloved, or loved less than before. That, I believe, is the biggest mistake people make in relationships.
This thought of not being loved enough soon turns into stress and anxiety. Unintentionally, you pour that anxiety onto the very person you wanted so badly. Things get messier, and the distance grows.
So here is the question I keep coming back to –
When we want someone in our life, isn’t it important to first understand their worth? To become someone who can recognise that worth, appreciate it, be grateful for it, and try to be deserving of it?
Most of us keep wanting them desperately while missing this link. We wholeheartedly hold on to them, but never once pause to ask whether we truly see & complement the person we are holding on to.
Maybe love begins there… ♥️
Aafreen•
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